Reading GROW was a turning point for me when I was going through a crisis of meaning in my life. In terms of conventional success -“ a well-paid professional job, a very happy family, a good social network, fulfilling hobbies -“ I seemed to have it all. But somehow I felt deeply, profoundly unfulfilled. I struggled with this feeling for many years as I travelled in trains, planes and cars from client to client. I felt ungrateful for the bountiful existence fate had chanced to serve me and that I didn't seem to want. I tried to knuckle down and -˜make lemonade from the lemons'. Then it all got too much, and I got to thinking seriously about my life. I realised I was judging -˜success' the wrong way. I was using someone else's definition of success, not my own. I sat down and wrote out what success really meant to me, and what it did not mean. I created my own success manifesto which helped me see that I was judging myself on totally the wrong benchmarks.
Over time I started to reset my life to fit in with my ideas of success, not anyone else's. It was not -“ and still is not -“ an easy journey, because we are all hard-wired by society, consumerism and education to define success as certain attributes. We think of success in very specific, limited terms such as our profession, looks, wealth and possessions. We don't stop to think of success in terms of wisdom gained, friendships made or moments experienced. Gradually I have started to loosen the tethers that bind me to one idea of success and align my whole life with another better idea, one that fits with how I feel deep inside. There is no way that I can tell anyone what success really means to them personally, but I do hope you can use GROW to help you find your own specific definition of success and, with the help of Jackie's guidance throughout the book, move towards it with confidence and bravery.