7 Steps to Emotional Intelligence

By: Rudy Vandamme , Denis Bridoux , Patrick E Merlevede


Products specifications
Attribute name Attribute value
Size: 234mm x 154mm
Pages : 418
ISBN : 9781899836505
Format: Paperback
Published: March 2000

7 Steps to Emotional Intelligence reveals the structure behind Emotional Intelligence (EI), utilising its unique framework to combine EI and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). This model-based guide, packed with powerful exercises and self-assessment techniques, enables you to design your own Emotional Quotient (EQ) improvement system and participate in an intensive EQ excellence course that draws on the self-programming practices of NLP.

A functionally-formatted guide to improving your EQ, this book serves as a textbook of EI theory, a manual of NLP techniques, and a workbook to systematically lead you through the process of dynamic EQ improvement.

Picture for author Rudy Vandamme

Rudy Vandamme

Rudy Vandamme is a trainer and coach. He runs his own institute.

Picture for author Denis Bridoux

Denis Bridoux

Denis Bridoux runs NLP and Neuro-semantics courses with applications to coaching and mentoring in France and the UK. He practices life and executive coaching.

Picture for author Patrick E Merlevede

Patrick E Merlevede

Patrick Merlevede is an internationally recognised specialist in the areas of talent management and emotional intelligence. Based on his own experience in these fields, he founded jobEQ.com, a cloud based service providing tools for assessing work attitude & motivation, values & organizational cultures and competencies. At the time of writing, jobEQ's tools were available in 18 languages and were being used by consultants, trainers and coaches in over 30 countries.

As trainer, modeller and author he was the first to make the link between Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and emotional intelligence. The result of the integration of these 2 fields has been written down in 7 Steps to Emotional Intelligence (2001).

Mastering Mentoring & Coaching with Emotional Intelligence (2004) focuses on upgrading mentoring and coaching approaches with concepts from NLP, emotional intelligence as well as the tools developed by jobEQ.

More recently he contributed a chapter to Innovations in NLP for Challenging Times (2011), outlining jobEQ's framework.

In 2014 he wrote Talent Management: A Focus on Excellence - Managing Human Resources in a Knowledge Economy. This book is based on the experience of jobEQ's customers, covering applications such as recruiting & assessment, training & coaching, team building & leadership and changing organizational cultures (see http://bit.ly/TMbookjobEQ).

Patrick continues to consult organizations in these areas, and coaches an international network of consultants and trainers who use the jobEQ principles and tools. He can be contacted through www.jobEQ.com

For more information, see the professional profile on LinkedIn.


  1. This book can help you develop your intellectual and emotional skills. It is practical, sound, and clear. Use it and become happier, more effective human beings.
  2. This book was first published in 1999 and in English in 2001. Since then there have numerous reprints and the latest edition now comes with interactive EQ assessment. This popular self-help and training guide in Emotional Intelligence (EI) and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) covers a wealth of information and exercises in a step-by-step (chapter by chapter) format.

    The authors provide clear definitions of EI and NLP and clarify and address the issues regarding EI first raised by Goleman in 1995, together with a glossary of terms. However this isn't a text book presenting theory and research as academic discussion, but a manual of applied understanding from the perspectives of EI and NLP. Hence the 7 core chapters are 'Ëœlessons' structured as teaching models with the key presuppositions explained at the very beginning.

    From defining EI (chapter 1)and explaining the importance of managing one's emotional energy (chapter 2), the authors then chart the reader's course through to achieving an enhanced EI ability beginning with Managing Your Emotions (chapter 3; Lesson 1) which includes how to use emotional states as resources to reach one's goals. Although each lesson and chapter can be covered as standalone sources, they also follow a logical and developmental order. The power of emotionally driven beliefs and knowing one's mission and values in life is covered with learning about Levels in Experience and Communication (Lesson 2), followed by Planning for Success as the focus Lesson 3. How to differentiate and regulate emotional states to understand how we each perceive the world from our own emotional position is covered in lesson 4 and this is then developed further in the following lesson on why it is vital for success to examine experiences from different perceptual positions to manage and avoid conflicts. Lessons 6 and 7 are more NLP focused on learning how to ask the right questions and developing key interaction skills from observation and understanding and applying basic NLP assumptions. Finally the concluding chapter provides a particularly helpful recapitulation, additional exercises and a 14-day 'Ëœto-do list' to work towards emotional wisdom.

    The blend of EI and NLP presented in a clear and developmental order of key assumptions with powerful and revealing activities provides a demonstrable case of how to use and teach EI and NLP. A recommended, easy to read text for anyone interested in coaching, self-development, teaching and researching, or with an interest - at any level - in EI and NLP.

  3. The title of the book is7 steps to emotional intelligence' authored by Patrick Merlevede, Denis Bridoux and Rudy Vandamme was first published in French in Belgium in 1999 by Garant Utigevers and later on translated into English in 2001 and published by Crown House in the UK. It is a book that can be used to develop one's self but also used to train others in the area of NLP and EI.

    The book review:

    The purpose of the book is two-fold in a sense that it is promoted as a self-improvement book but also as a reference book that you can read either chapter by chapter or selectively according to your needs. The chapters are written in a way that they can stand on their own as complete lessons, which can be used on their own independently or by blending them in and use them together. It is important to note that the main goal of this publication is to refocus our attention on the impact of emotions on cognitive behaviour indiscriminately of age. The format of each chapter reads as a lesson plan with clear and distinct aims and goals, stated at the beginning of the chapter and written in plain English, which makes them an easy step by step guidebook to follow. The authors' writing style is appropriate to the referred audience and they have managed to level the technical language without losing on the technicality and originality of the language used to describe core concepts in the theories discussed in the book.

    The authors use exposition and argument to explain and convince the reader about the various methods available to use in the development of EI competency. They also use a number of models to support their arguments. The activities and exercises suggested in this book are evidenced by a number of presuppositions from the NLP theories and models. This requires the reader to have a general understanding and appreciation of the theories and models discussed to be able to seize the arguments presented. Unless you have that underlying knowledge you may not always appreciate the purpose and meaning of the activities and exercises included at the end of each chapter. I personally found the exercises an add-on value to this book because they help the reader to consolidate the arguments.

    This book has made me re-think and re-evaluate my approach to emotional development and has certainly reinforced my ideas about EI development skills and their significance to personal development. I found the book a useful resource which allows flexible approach to the ideas and concepts it promotes. I feel it deserves to be a core book on EI and I thoroughly recommend it for training purposes. It is a book that all researchers, teachers of EI and students can benefit from.
  4. A great book that applies NLP theory in a practical way. Excellent summary of major aspects of NLP (especially TOTE, Neurological levels, language and rapport), backed up by useful references and research findings sometimes missing from such books. I'd recommend this book to anybody who has completed an NLP practitioner course and would like to know more about the theory and how to apply it in business as well as in their personal lives.

    The exercises are clear and accessible. As a coach I look forward to using many of these with clients. The book is well laid out and clearly structured to allow you to quickly find the parts of the book which may be of most interest. In the acknowledgements the authors quote Norman Mailer: "Writing books is the closest men ever come to childbearing." When you see the breadth and depth of this book you can understand why they say this. Any pain is well hidden as the book is clear and focused throughout by avoiding the jargon or tortuous metaphors sometimes found in books that tackle a subject somewhere between science and art.
  5. A key feature of NLP is the understanding and management of your own, and other's, emotional states. NLP techniques can, therefore, be of great use in the field of emotional intelligence. This is the aim of this book, and the authors provide an important and well put together NLP based toolkit for EI practitioners " virtually the whole of NLP is covered including rapport, anchoring, perceptual positions, meta-programmes, meta-model, logical levels and much more. Widely researched, well written and presented, this is primarily an NLP book, and I recommend it to NLP Practitioners expanding their practices to include EI. However, the book is not "about" EI as such and contains little about the development of EI, key researchers and writers, tools and measures etc. If you do not have an NLP background then you should probably start your journey into emotional intelligence elsewhere (Emotionally Intelligent Living by Geetu Orme is a good starting point), but if you have a good knowledge of NLP then this is definitely a good crossover work.
  6. This book is interesting, enjoyable and useful.

    A definite must for anyone who finds that their emotions automatically lead their behaviour and their life. The authors explain clearly the connection between what we feel, what we think and what we do. It is very helpful if you find that you allow others to manipulate or "guilt" you into doing what they want you to do or if you find that you allow others to "push your buttons'.

    Packed with useful exercises and handy tips to aid you deal with conflict comfortably, this book is a good personal development read.

    It teaches you simple ways to get you life back on track in ways that are best for you.

    What I like about this book is that the authors don't tell you what to do, they allow each person to design a personal improvement system that suits them. But reading isn't enough " you have to do what needs to be done. So give it a go, it's worth it.
  7. This comprehensive book, written from a mature NLP perspective and written by three leaders in the field, is loaded with powerful insights to fire up " and help you understand- your emotional strength. 7 Steps makes a fresh and authoritative contribution on E.I. for anyone who is keen to extend their learning about the way we human beings work. Take it steady and drip-feed it in " each page has nutrients worth absorbing into your bloodstream and you'll not want to miss their empowering effect.

    Andrew Sercombe, Master Coach, broadcaster and author
    Executive Director: Powerchange " the Personal Development Service
  8. Research has shown that the people who make it to the top in an organisation are those with 'emotional intelligence'. What do your emotions mean? How can you manage your emotions, how can you deal with conflicts in an emotionally intelligent way? What motivates people? How or can you handle situations in the best possible way? How or do you get what you want and at the same time ensure that other people get what they want?

    I'm sure you have asked yourself some of these questions at some stage of your life. This book is aimed at helping you find the solutions. This easy to read book will have you managing your emotional budget in no time at all. Utilising various NLP patterns and strategies like the Disney Pattern the authors take us on a journey - starting at understanding our emotions, to managing our emotions and getting the best results in any given situation.

    The authors look at both undesired and desired emotions and the impact they have on our lives and relationships. Particularly interesting is the discussion of the meta-programs of an emotionally intelligent person.

    If you really want to get on in your life, your company or work, and strive for the top, then emotional intelligence is crucial. This book gives clear instructions on how you can do just that. You can learn to interact successfully with yourself and others.

    Danielle Baillieu, NLP News, Magazine of the INLPTA December 2003

Write your own review